Fried chicken lover’s, listen up yo! (Please re-read that with a tough guy American accent. Thank you. If you know who Randy Jackson is, then that’s the voice I REALLY want you to read it in).
I did it. I finally got my gluten hatin’ arse over to Bird Restaurant in Shoreditch. I ate fried chicken, I ate fries, and I scraped the breadcrumbs off the corn pudding and dived straight into that too. And it was good. So let me give you the lowdown.
We were seated at our table and our waitress ran through the menu to show me what was and wasn’t gluten free friendly. I prayed to the Gluten Free Gods that on my next visit to Bird Restaurant there might be gluten free waffles on the menu because I wanted that Chicken and Waffle Burger so bad! Then I got over myself and narrowed down my options, until I made a decision.
Fried Chicken pieces for me. You can even choose dark, white, or mixed meat. I chose dark because duh, it’s the best when you’re not considering your calories. And I ordered a Buffalo glaze too, because I was there to succeed in all things fried and full of badness. Salad dodging to the max. Fries are obviously an essential accompaniment to fried chicken, and corn pudding sounded good too, so hey why not? TBND ordered the Fried Chicken Sandwich, which meant I could take a tiny little bite, just to try y’know? My gluten hating body at least allows me that, without fly kicking the crap out of my system. Small wins.
We waited for the goods to arrive, and I had a giggle over the back of the menu. ‘Free Range and Fried’. No sugarcoating the truth here. Just drowning it in loads of oil instead.
Our food arrived pretty quickly, like not so quickly that you think ‘Did they just microwave that?’ but the kind of quick where you know the chef has taken his time to whip up something bad arse for you with tender loving care, but not left you out in the restaurant starving like Tom Hanks in Cast Away.
Now let it be known, that I’m not actually a fan of fried chicken. I’ve never understood those that crave KFC! It leaves me feeling ill and oily!
So I was careful not to over order at Bird. I ordered two pieces of the chicken, and that was definitely enough for me. But daaaaaamn guurl! That chicken was gooooood! (A Nicki Minaj-esque accent for reading that sentence please. Finger snapping optional).
The sauce that they drizzle on the chicken was amazing, and topped with my Buffalo glaze dip, the whole thing was finger lickin’ fricken awesome.
But you may not be a finger lickin’ fan. Don’t worry, they’ve got you covered at Bird! You’re provided with refreshing wipes. They’ve thought this messy chicken eating through.
We munched our way through the fries, I had a wee taste of the Fried Chicken Sandwich, which ticked all the ‘this is awesome’ boxes and the corn pudding was ace too. I should also mention here as a side note to all gluten dodgers, that Bird can make the corn pudding without breadcrumbs, I just forgot to ask.
With the exception of about seven fries left in the bowl we had demolished everything. Does anyone else do that? I always feel a little less guilty if I leave a few fries. I think that’s the ludicrous equivalent of ordering a burger with a diet coke, but whatever works, so I’ll continue to leave a few fries if it makes me feel just a tiny bit less greedy.
We looked at the dessert menu, and our second stomach screamed GET THE CHERRY SUNDAE!!!! but the stomach that had just consumed all that chicken was shouting back saying YOU BETTER CHECK YOSELF BEFORE YOU WRECK YOSELF! And so we decided to listen to sense, and leave dessert for another trip back to Bird.
We settled the bill and then oh so casually TBND says to me ‘There’s Russell Brand’. It was the end of the weekend, my brain was working slowly. I was thinking ‘Russell Brand? Russell Brand. I know that name. Russell Brand’. Penny finally drops. I look out the window at a driver backing his car out with a passenger in the backseat. ‘OMG! IT’S RUSSELL BRAND!!!’. Total bucket list celeb moment for me. His vegan self lives above Bird. Needless to say you won’t be seeing Russ dining in there anytime soon, but lets leave him to rant about the state of the world, and you guys can get down to some other, just as important business. Eating free range AND fried chicken from Bird.